The Splash

There really should be some kind of rule book for people using swimming pools. And in it should be rule one: Don't chose the open area for doddery paddlers to do sprint lengths.

It's a bit like Roger Federer going to the public tennis courts and playing normally with someone like me. Sure we'd all look and wonder at the silky movement and fleet feet but you would ask yourself why.

I found myself posing this question while ambling along in the open area at Parmentier this morning. There was a muscular swimmer who commandeered a lane and went up and down it with dazzling rapidity.

None of the other paddlers dared go anywhere near it for fear of upsetting our local Poseidon. I'm quite surprised none of the lifeguards ushered him into the the lanes for those in need of speed.

The showman slightly overshadowed my paddle but it didn't prevent me from eventually reaching my own goal.

I got out as Mr Muscles continued to make waves. As I was getting my stuff out of my locker I wondered if you could complain about aggressive swimmers.

What would be the etiquette and whose right would be supported?

But given that time is so limited during public swimming sessions before the schools go back in would you want to spend it on such a subjective issue?

It's probably best to do the aquatic equivalent of opening out your newspaper to hide behind.

But even if you keep your head down under the water you can often hear the beeping of the watches telling their wearers they've done 200 miles in just under four and half minutes.